Moments that leave you speechless...

Today I had one of those moments... One of our little girls, she's 11, is going to camp with her school next week. She is HIV+ and for the first time will need to be somewhat in charge of taking her twice-daily ARV's (anti-retroviral medication) by herself. She had been told that she was HIV+ over a year ago, but it had gone over her head a bit when she was 9, so her house mom and I decided that I would take her out for ice cream and explain it to her again. I tried to choose my words so carefully, not wanting to scare her, but also wanting her to help her understand how important it is for her to take her medicine right at 7am and 7pm each day. How to help a child not be afraid when they're told they have the same virus that they saw their mother die of 2 years ago is difficult...
Here's how the conversation went:
Me: I'm so excited for you to go to camp! You'll get to be in charge of your medication all by yourself, do you think you can do it?! (with a smile)
Her: Yes!
Me: Do you know why you take medicine sweetie?
Her: No.
Me: Well, it's because you have something called HIV, and your mommy gave it to you, and the medicine is what makes sure you stay strong and healthy. Do you remember when your mommy got sick?
Her: Yes.
Me: The reason she started to get sick from HIV is because she didn't have the medicine that you get to have. HIV is something that lives in your blood and tries to be in charge of the cells that keep you healthy. If the HIV gets to be in charge then your body has trouble staying strong, but if you take the medicine exactly right, then it can help your cells stay stronger than the HIV, so that you won't get sick. But that's why you go to Bara (Baragwanath hospital in Soweto - a township - has an AIDS clinic that many of our kids go to every few weeks) so that they can check your blood to make sure that there aren't too many HIV cells. Because if there are they will need to change your medication a little bit. So the medicine you take is what is going to help you stay healthy so that you can be an old granny someday!
Her: So I'm going to have to take medication even when I get big?
Me: Yup. When you get big then you'll be in charge of going to the doctor all by yourself for them to check your blood. But you know what? Lots of people in South Africa have HIV, and even lots of kids. Kids can get it from their mommies sometimes, like you and your little sister.
Her: But she takes different medicine then me.
Me: I know, and it's because everybody's HIV is a little bit different, so they give you the medicine that's exactly right for you.
Her: So if I don't take my medicine, will I die like my mommy?
Me: (as I took a deep breath and prayed for the right words) Well, if you stopped taking your medicine, then you would get very sick like your mommy did. But she didn't get to have the medicine like you have, so with your medicine, you will get to be much older then your mommy was. I think she was so sad not to get to see you grow up, but you are going to get to grow up and be such an old lady! That's why your mommy brought you and your sister to Acres, because she knew that we could give you medicine to keep you healthy and she loved you very very much.
Her: Okay.
Me: Do you have any other questions about HIV?
Her: No, but I'll think about it. Do you know what my favorite kind of pizza is...?

And so ended a conversation that took my breath away...

Last week I talked one little girl through her first period and a teenager through her first kiss - this job is a little crazy, but I love it!!!! Nowhere else I'd rather be...

And yesterday I went to help fetch a two month old baby who's dad was offering to pay people to take him. He's the most perfect baby boy and it's hard to imagine what must have been going through the dad's mind as he placed his son in my arms. He was shocked, and a little relieved, when we told him that we didn't want money from him, we just wanted to make sure his baby was safe...
What a weekend this has been! (oh, and today I attended my first Mother/Daughter Mother's Day Tea in which I was the mother - pay no mind to the fact that I would have been 17 when having my "daughter") :o)


Happy Mother's Day to you Mom, and to all of my mom friends :o)